I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Randomize
