okay pat passed out under dana's car
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
We had to coat check the pizza.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Randomize
