An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
