Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
