Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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