Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
