i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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