U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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