Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Randomize
