just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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