I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
