I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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