we're chasing vodka with high fives
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
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