I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Randomize
