Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
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