my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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