are you still at the devil's house?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize
