Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
