Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
