I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
