he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
