Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
