why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
