They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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