Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
Randomize
