I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize