How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize
