So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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