Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
