I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I'm both gender and math confused
I need mimosas to revive my soul
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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