dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
