she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
