I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Someone shattered a urinal.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
