Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Randomize
