sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
As shirtless as possible
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
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