Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
