It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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