I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
