Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Randomize
