She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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