you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
