you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
