i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
you would pick up someone in the library
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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