eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
