I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Randomize