I cannot find my penis.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
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