We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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