Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
How's work?
Spinning.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
