if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Can you bring me the toilet please
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
