I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
